Funny Jokes at Jokes Village

A husband and wife were expecting their newborn baby boy.

“We will name him Jacob after me,” said the husband.

“No, I want to name him Taylor,” said the wife.

“Taylor is a girls name”, the disappointed husband replied.

“No it’s not”, replied the wife. ”

I don’t want my son to be named after a female country singer,” shouted the husband.

“Fine” said the wife.

The soon to be dad smiled and said “I can’t wait to play football with him and watch NASCAR”.

The mom smiled and said, “I don’t think you have to wait must longer… my water just broke!!!”

So, they rushed to the hospital and soon the baby was being delivered. The husband and wife were so excited.

As the baby popped out the dad said, “Jacob you are gonna be a star!!!”

The the doctors laid the baby on its mommy’s belly and said, “Congratulations, its a new baby girl”!!!

“Well Taylor it is”, laughed the mom.

A young boy asked his mother where babies come from and she answered “Go ask your father”.

He asked his father the same question and he answered “Go ask your mother!”

Later that day at dinner the boy announced “I know that I am not your son because neither one you know where babies come from”

When a baby is learning to eat,
shouldn’t he
have an L-plate?

Why did the baby monster put his father
in
the freezer?
Because he wanted frozen pop.

Mum, is it true my baby sister came
from
Heaven?
Yes, that’s right.
Well, I don’t blame God for chucking
her out.

Three men were discussing at a bar about

coincidences. The first man said, ” my wife was reading a “tale of two

cities” and she gave birth to twins”
“That’s funny”, the second man
remarked, “my wife was reading ‘the
three musketeers’ and she
gave birth to triplets”
The third man shouted, “Good God, I have to
rush home!”
When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, ” When I
left the
house, my wife was reading Ali baba and the forty
Thieves”!!!

What did
the Pharaohs use to keep their
babies quiet?
Egyptian dummies.

Mother: Why is there a strange baby in the
crib?
Daughter: You told me to change the baby.

Q: How many baby sitters
does it take to
change a light bulb?
A: None, They don’t make Pampers small enough.

Dewey and Odell met
on the Brownsville main
street. “Say,” said Dewey, “Ah hurd yew and
yore wife is goin’ ta
night school ta take Spanish lessons. How cum?”
“Uh huh,” answered
Odell. “We went and adopted us a little Mexican
baby, and we wanna
be able ta understand him when he gets old enough ta
talk!”