Funny Jokes at Jokes Village

Girlfriend: Will you love me when I’m old and

fat and ugly?
Boyfriend: Of course I do !

Mary: Do you think my sister’s pretty
?
Gary: Well, let’s just say if you pulled her pigtail she’d probably

say ‘oink, oink ‘!

Did you hear about the girl monster who wasn’t

pretty and wasn’t ugly ?
She was pretty ugly

She’s the kind of girl that boys look at twice
-
they can’t believe it the first time.

Bill: My sister has lovely
long red hair
all down her back.
Will: Pity it’s not on her head.

Julie had broken off her
engagement. Her
friend asked her what had happened. ‘I thought it was love at
first
sight,’ said Julie.
‘It was, but it was the second and third
sights that changed my
mind.

Beautician: Did that mud pack I gave you for

your girlfriend improve her appearance ?
Man: It did for a while -
then it fell off.

Two teenage boys were
talking in the
classroom. One said, ‘I took my girlfriend to see ‘The
bride of
Dracula’ last night.’
‘Oh yeah,’ said the other, ‘ what was she like
?’
‘Well she was about six foot six, white as a ghost and she had
big red
staring eyes and fangs.’
The other said, ‘Yes, but what
was ‘The Bride of Dracula’ like
?’

I can’t understand why people say my
girlfriend’s legs look like
matchsticks. They do look like sticks - but
they certainly don’t
match.

What did the really ugly man do for a living
?
He posed for Halloween masks !